Mud Walk

This week has been a rougher one. Going after my dreams and running fearlessly towards those goals might seem fancy or special, but in reality it sometimes resembles more walking through knee high mud than dancing in flowery fields. Taking risks means putting yourself into a vulnerable position and that's exactly what I've felt like…vulnerable. I realised that that's the emotion I have to get used to. I've often thought that when I make it to this point or I achieve these goals, I'm going to be good and everything will be easier, but it couldn't be further from the truth. As a dreamer (which we are all created to be) I will come up with new, even bigger dreams after achieving the first ones. Even though at that point I will have some victories in my personal history to pull from, I'll still have to push myself to the edge, again, to fly even higher. So no, it won't get any easier, quite the opposite. With greater achievements comes greater responsibilities and challenges. My part is not to fight off these feelings, but to find my peace in the midst of them. I'm learning how to enjoy the uncomfortable.

Having people backing me up has been one of the most important factors on this journey. If it wasn't for the uncountable encouraging words, ass-kicking pushes and loving advice, I would have given up before I even started. None of us are supposed to make it on our own. Even if you're a hundred precent confident in what you're doing and feel like you can do it all by yourself, you still need people to cover your blind spots if you want to secure your place. We all have our moments of feeling overwhelmed, letting that fear creep in with it's poisonous lies and that's when we need someone reminding us of the truth. I've found out that it's not weakness to need others, but strong people know when their resources are low and aren't afraid of asking for help. At times that can be the most productive thing to do. Building that core group around you, who you can trust through thick and thin, is a crucial step towards your full potential. Without the people in my life, I wouldn't be where I am today and I know I couldn't go where I'm heading...

And the day came

When the risk it took

To remain tight and closed in the bud

Was more painful

Than the risk it took to bloom

This is the element of freedom.

~Alicia Keys

xxx

Photos by Adriana Dobrin

Leather Jacket: Zara

Wool Sweatshirt: Zara

Leather  Pants: Rock'n'Blue

Boots: Aldo

Bag: Calvin Klein